I'm Not Angry At Boomers Anymore. I Just Wish They'd Believed Us.

For a lot of Millennials there is a constant feeling of failure, even if we technically haven't failed. We were taught that if we played by the rules, we would have success, and we took that seriously. According to Pew Research, Millenials are the most educated generation in American history. We worked hard in school, took on extracurricular activities like band or sports, went to college or a tech school, got a degree or completed a program, and entered the workforce, expecting to be rewarded for our efforts.

Rewards we were promised by our parents and grandparents if we just worked hard enough.

But then we came of age during the recession of 2008. Those of us old enough to purchase homes couldn't afford them. Those of us still in high school or college found ourselves facing tuition costs that either locked us into decades of debt or locked us out of higher education altogether. Our options narrowed to a sliver. The "American Dream" was dead.

In response to this, we settled for minimum wage jobs, thinking back on our grandparents who worked minimum wage jobs and could still afford small homes. We listened to them brag about raising four or more children on a single minimum wage income and we believed we could too. We may have wanted more than what our grandparents had, but we were ready to settle for the same.

But then the minimum wage stopped going up, even though the cost of housing, groceries, insurance, and more didn't stop rising. We tried to pivot into better paying careers, because according to our parents and grandparents that was the solution. But we ran into the cost of tuition again. We ran into jobs that paid minimum wage, but required years of experience we didn't have.

Entry level jobs disappeared. They're still called by the same name, but that's only because they pay entry level salaries, despite requiring five to ten years of experience. Faced with this new economic reality, we learned how to side-hustle. We acquired new skills, thanks to YouTube videos and WikiHow articles. We worked extra jobs. And all the while our parents and grandparents kept telling us if we worked hard enough, we'd be rewarded for our efforts.

And yet over and over again, we haven't been rewarded for our efforts. We haven't seen the fruits of our labors.

For most Millennials, we're stuck. We're approaching 40 - some of us, like my spouse and I, are already in our 40's - and we have very little to show for it. Not because we didn't work hard, but because the game was rigged against us. Our parents and grandparents succeeded, and then pulled the ladder to success up behind them. I don't think they meant to, but that is what happened.

My spouse and I are some of the lucky ones. He qualified for several scholarships to a small state university near his hometown. It isn't a prestigious university, but it was affordable. So he graduated college without the specter of tens of thousands of dollars of tuition debts looming over him. His physical and mental health suffered from the pressure and strain of never missing a day of school for 12 years and graduating with a 4.2 gpa, but at least he got to go to college.

I, on the other hand, wasn't so lucky. I came from a lower-income family, and did not have much outside support from the school system or my community. I escaped my abusive home environment at 18 and started working two, and sometimes three, jobs to survive. I couldn't afford college, nor did I have the time between my jobs to take classes, so higher education wasn't an option for me.

Sure, I survived anyways. And sure, I "pulled myself up by my bootstraps," but were it not for marrying my spouse, I would still be in poverty. Because my spouse was fortunate to have had access to higher education and graduated with only $6,000 in debt that wasn't covered by his scholarships, when we got married we were able to start building our careers and credit/family before the recession of 2008. Before everything got really, really bad.

However, our siblings, just a couple of years younger, didn't get there in time. The recession hit and that was it for them, even though they also went to college and had degrees. Sometimes I think my spouse and I were some of the last Millenials to make it out before the economic gate slammed shut, locking our fellow Millennials inside a broken system.

Even still, we have had hard years. On paper we're lower middle class, but in reality we're struggling too. We can't afford to go to the doctor because every employer we've worked for the last ten years only offers an HDHP, or High Deductible Health Plan. We have to pay thousands of dollars out of pocket before our health insurance kicks in. So, we just don't go to the doctor.

There are other sacrifices we accept because despite what our salaries look like on paper, the money just doesn't go as far as it once did. Where I live a gallon of milk is up to $8. A four-pack of off-brand, one-ply toilet paper is $10. I'm glad we don't have a baby because formula prices are astronomical as well. On paper we make more money than our parents did, but when you take the cost of living and inflation into consideration, we're actually struggling as much, if not more, than they did. The American dollar just doesn't go that far these days.

I try not to waste my time being mad at older generations anymore. I don't think they realized the consequences for their actions, choices, or voting records. I don't think they knew what was going to happen to their children when they grew up. I really don't.

But, the fact remains that Millennials, and now Gen Z, and likely soon Gen Alpha, are suffering the sins of our parents and grandparents. We are paying the price for bad economic policy, loose tax laws that benefit the ruling class, and a series of administrations, on both sides of the aisle, that care more about appeasing billionaires who make up just 1% of our society, than caring for the other 99% of Americans who keep our economy afloat with our labor and our spending.

We learned enough US and World history in school or through access to the internet to see the political, social, and economic writing on the wall. We recognize the signs of impending collapse. We see the rise of fascism for what it is. And many of us are rightfully terrified of what is still to come.

Unfortunately when we bring these issues up to our parents and grandparents, we're mocked. They tell us we're lying or we're playing victim cards. They see us struggling to keep our lights on and our children fed, but continue to assume we just didn't work hard enough, even though they attended our high school and college graduations. They saw us work hard to have what they have.

But we don't have what they have. And it is unlikely we ever will.

I spent several years being angry at my Boomer parents and Silent Generation grandparents over this. I was angry that they got duped by snake oil salesmen dressed up like politicians. I was angry that they still believe they can't be lied to, even though they have been for decades. They believe they can't be tricked, even when it is so obvious they were and still are, especially when it comes to digital media aka social media and content/news they find online.

The anger was strong for a very long time, but I'm exhausted by it now. My anger won't change what's happened to my generation and the generations to come. My anger won't protect my Gen Z teenager from the consequences of their grandparents' inaction. So, I don't see the point in carrying it around with me anymore.

But, I do wish we could be believed. I wish instead of being defensive and dismissive, our parents and grandparents could be empathetic and compassionate. I wish they would listen more and talk less. I wish they'd stop seeing us as children and treat us like adults who know what we're talking about.

I'm not a teenager whining about avocado toast or a new cellphone. I am a 40 year old married woman with a teenager, a mortgage, and a career. I know what I'm talking about. And I really wish our parents, for once, would believe us when we say:

We're not okay. And we need you to wake up and see what's happening because it's going to happen to your grandchildren and great-grandchildren if you don't open your eyes and see that you've been made fools by billionaires and con-men.

Don't think it isn't going to happen to you as well. Look at what's happening to your social security. Look at the cost of your healthcare. Consider the 18% rise in homelessness in 2024 and see how many of those newly homeless are YOUR AGE.

Please believe us. Please. Because very soon you're going to need us. And I fear there will be nothing we can do to help you. Worse yet, even if we could, it's unlikely that we'll want to.

Because you should have believed us. And instead you believed false prophets and grifters. You chose your ignorance and egos over your children and grandchildren. And it has led all of us to ruin.